What is the one main thing that you need to allocate all of your energy to, knowing that if you did, you would be living your dreams?
Make the one thing the only thing. I know what you're thinking, it's to hard to say NO to all of the invitations from others. Without making your one thing - the only thing then you are becoming part of someone else's one thing!
I get the feeling that you've been doing all of those other things far to long. You're not alone. Like most people you've avoided asking and deciding what that one thing is. Without this deeper knowing, it's far to easy to take a back seat and let others influence so many other, non-essential things!